完美的句点

本来以为你已在我的记忆里。可当伤口被划开，现实却是那么血淋淋的。当你说要把把我从你那除掉，心真的很痛。原以为还能当朋友，没想到结局却是这样。你问我还喜欢你吗？想说，我真的喜欢。可是，现实总是残忍的，我只能说，我不知道。就算现在再喜欢，我也不愿以后想你想到心痛，会埋怨为什么当我最需要你的时候，你却不在我身边。远距离，我真的怕了。曾想过等以后，我们彼此比较靠近的时候再谈复合。可是这一切不能再想了。我是一个自私的人，拒绝伤害。谢谢你这么爱过我。你的好，我都记得。所以我不愿把和你的回忆和东西丢掉。我会把有关你的记忆埋在心底的最深处，默默的为你祷告，给于祝福。虽然不再联系，但是我偶尔会想想你的。我会加油。也希望在远处的你，也能加油。我想我明白你送我这首歌的意义了。还欠你一句，我原谅你了。


也许还能在网上看到你的消息
也许我唱的歌还存在你的手机
也许我爱你埋在心底变成秘密
也许你想我的时候我也在想你
多少次我告诉自己
此情可待已成追忆
多少次我告诫自己
不再为你流泪到一败涂地
我和你不再联系
希望你不要介意
要怪就怪当初没在一起
而你对现在也比较满意
所以我留下来也没有道理
我和你断了联系
不代表我不想你
走到哪里还是会有惦记
而我也开始试着去忘记
抹去我们过去的放弃的所有交集

24/11/11

那天以为能高高兴兴的帮朋友庆祝生如，没想到结果却是这样。因为一些笨蛋误会而把派对毁了。而且还害到朋友受伤，车被毁，真是说不上的歉意。真希望受伤的不是他，而是我。把一切弄得不欢而散，最好的朋友还过了一个非常糟糕的生日。因为那天的不愉快，而取消了真正的生日派对，我真的很难过。是说女生最珍惜的21岁生日都无法快乐的度过，我怕她会感到遗憾。 P.S - We can't change what already happened. But we can change what had happened into strength and walk on it. Life is a progress. Fail means success. As we know, no pain, no gain. No matter what happen, as long as we do our best, God will do the rest. Anyway, Happy Birthday to my best friend.

Celebrated my birthday twice this year. I feel thankful to all my friends and thanx for those wishes you all gave to me. First celebration was on 20th Aug. We had our dinner at Rumors and next we went to Big Mouth. And thanx to my friends who gave me a surprise by suddenly came out with a present. ;) second celebration was on 24th of Aug at Lava. My dear really put so much effort to my birthday party. Flowers all came from no way and passed to me. First time ever received the candy flowers from my friends and some unknown friends. Thanx for it and i love it so much. And the cake that made from my dear was so yummy. And it was a jelly yam cake. Oh yeah, i did some shy sexy dance on the stage too but not sexy at all. I am drunk in both night but I still managed to control myself lah. Haha. And thanx to my friend who take good care of me and sent me home safely both night. You are such a good friend of mine. =) my actual day of my birthday was in KL. Luckily there are still one of my best friend accompanied me and countdown with me. ^^

^^

还有几天就生日啦~ 可是这年的生日要提早办。今年怎么没有庆祝的feel呢？不管那个了~ 好想买一部手机哦~ 时间赶快过，金钱赶快来。^^

看到一篇很‘我’的文章。。

有些东西失去了就是失去了，有些人错过了就是错过了。当一切尘埃落定，沧海已化桑田。谢谢你，曾经给我那段美好的回忆，也谢谢你让我懂得了珍惜。曾经年少的轻狂和无知，将是我以后人生的最大宝藏。祝福你。

Me?!

i'm choosen as an admin in a group because of i am
1 ) a careful girl
2 ) i am not an impulsive person
3 ) i have postive mindset?

Weird?! I have no idea. I am a careful one? not really. I juz being over protective. Protective from being harm from others. Sometime i do envy some people can do thing without think it properly. At least they are happy with who they are, what they do. People like me, over thinking, will think too much. Sometime it's a burden. Wanna let myself free, but hard to. Maybe i'm too choosy?! Hmm... Yeah~ Part of me is like that.

I consider myself is a considerate person. Like win-win situation. As i am a over-thinking person, what i do will count the step. But of course, sometime i am a so called 'cincai' person. You treat me good, i treat you good as well. I am loyal to who i am. I wont juz follow the wind. Wont judge a book by it's over. But, as you show your true face, sorry, u are out of my life.

Positive mindset?! Yes, I have. But sometime its hard to think by this way. Things happened everyday. Who knows i will change my mindset next second. Try not to hurt people but hurt still there. Things out of the control is a really bad feeling. Always feel sorry to the one. Will accept whatever is the outcome. Sometime i will think whether the decision i made is right. But as it has been made sure because of some of the reason or problem. I accept it. That's why i feel better.

709~

今天，我在脸书上看到很多关于709的link.其中有一个是关于警察对着普通的市民喊。不知道他想红还是什么。只看到很多人很无辜的被牵拖。感觉很可怜。连国外都有报道。。这次真的红到国外去了。今天不理‘戒严’ 跟朋友出去喝茶，还不是相安无事。。沙巴电费要起15%啦~工资几时才起啊？现在每个月都要还200多块电费。害我不能 开着冷气做运动。。 == 今天去了趟 Tanjung Aru买水果，还吃了我爱吃的芒果酸呢~买的时候胃还有些不舒服，可是吃了，还是不舒服。还想以毒攻毒的说。。哈哈。。。

累了。。

 不知道自己的决定是不是对的。。头脑一直在想着那件事。不是说好要放弃了吗！ 怎么还要再想呢~很无助，很想哭~ 好想大喊哦！ :(

血。。。

最近好像很容易看到周围的人受伤。现在轮到我了~ T.T 今天早上工作的时候不小心弄到脚流血了。。还跟我外婆开玩笑说是弄到受伤而头晕。其实是自己最近都不够睡，再加上贫血而造成的。亏我还喝了碗红豆汤，可是还是没有什么见效。而且还有点想呕。难道红豆汤对我没效了吗？！还想去捐血呢~ 现在这样，怎么捐 =/ 只好在头晕晕的情况下工作了。惨~ @@

手术。。

动完手术会有多痛？ 很能上网吗？ 肯定是比较难驾车。而且动个手术要四千多块！好贵哦~ =/

后知后觉。。。

如果这是你的选择，我也认了。我会尊重你所做的选择。。让我们彼此一起加油吧！

Friendship Connection...

那是一个风和日丽的早晨，春暖花开的季节。。 Though Malaysia dont have 4 seasons. ^^ I went to Kota Belud with my cell members. That was a wonderful holiday with friends. I experienced 150km/h speed. That was a heart accelerate car drive. I went to Kota Belud on Sunday and Mount Kinabalu on the next day. Never know that Kota Belud has such a beatiful view. Thanx to Marvin for bring us to his hometown and her sister, Winnie prepared the dinner and next day breakfast for us. Went to friend's farm. A lot of goats n sheeps there. We went to yamcha at a high hill at night but unfortunately there was no star during the night. When we on the way to Mount Kinabalu, the view was absolutely fastastic. I was amazed by the view of the nature. I can see Mount Kinabalu along the way. The reflection of the rock of mountain, waterfall, that was awesome. And we have our early dinner at Ranau, chicken wingsssss. That were so delicious. A must eat when we go to Ranau. Been through a lot these few days. Sad and happy. But when time comes, time will heal. Feels like life is always out of control. But we can always control ourselves. =)

条件。。。

我有一个好朋友跟我说，她配不上那位男生。那男生长得帅，高大，神秘，还有很多人爱慕他。她的条件不大好，不值得跟他谈恋爱。对我来说，条件不是一个问题。如果人人都以条件来择偶，那么他们不就要天天换伴侣？！择偶，不应该看心吗？还是我是错的。。。

是心境上的改变吗？？

以前，每当我看到令人感到感伤的文章，不知不觉中，也会感觉到痛。可是最近的我，不知道为什么，每当看到这些感伤的文章，会不由自主的会发出一阵冷笑。是心境上的改变吗？还是我对那些文章已经麻木了？难道我不在感性了吗。。。

The Days....

The decision was made... That was a hard decision. Suddenly, i think of Jolin Tsai's song.倒带(rewind) I like this song very much. For some reason, feel the lyric or the rhythm just quite suite my mood. Let's bygone be bygone. I'm still the me. The one and only me. Loyal to myself. Maybe I do change myself in others opinion, but I'm glad that this is the me I want to be. No regret. We will find a better life. Feel free these few days. Mindset are blank. No thinking, or purposely dont want to think of something. No burden, the future planning no more in my mind. No restriction, not need to limit myself to some activities. I do find i'm lost sometime, try to be stong, not to be emotional, never show the weak me. I will disgust to myself I'm a week person. Whatever, whole new me is coming. I will find a way to go through this. Cheers... to the future me.

Glad to have u in my life.

一个人忙碌了很久，是需要人陪的。我很高兴我的好朋友能够找到一个合适她的男友。她也有脆弱的一面。希望这个男的会好好的对她。不然，我会有非常恐怖的一面。然是我的人都知道我不大发脾气。可是伤害到我的好朋友可是另外一回事。无论如何，我只希望她能够很幸福，很幸福。因为她值得一个很好很好的人对待她。She is the most special friend in my life. She is my soul friend. No matter what, i will always support n by her side. Dear, i just want you have a happy ever life. Every good things happen on you. You are the most precious precious friend of mine. Love you. =)

Sermon by Pastor Jonathan David

* If our life didn't change, we can't change anyone.
* Don't be a coward.
* Everyone has their own duty.
* If we cannot work inside(thinking), we cannot work at outside(action).
* We need to take the proactive action and go, God will follows us and beside us. God wants us to go first. We have a commission. Where we go, He will enter.
* God will gives us opportunity to bring His harvest. Harvest of finance, people, talented people, ability, harvest of plentiful. Don't miss the opportunity, opportunity wouldn't wait for us. We must get ready.
* God gives us open heaven of spiritual stature. I am no longer of who I am, but I need to step up a higher stature. We have a name in the heaven. Something can change because our position has changed.

Nothing Is Impossible...

Went out with sushi on Tuesday. Found that we didn't meet each others for since CNY. A lot of things to talk.
Really found out that she is the one that very encouraging. She always gives the suggestion to the problem, but not the solution of the problem. Likewise, the problem that we are facing each day, we need to work it out by ourselves, but not just depend on others. People might gives us a very good suggestion. But when come to decide, it's all about ourselves. Some may finds the problem is very difficult. But, as long as we solve it, we keep on moving, we can find that we are growing into a higher level. =)

The book that i bought 'Bad Girls'

Here are the summary,

Some stars are born to go supernova,

But when they crash to Earth,

the fallout is explosive...

Stunning supermodel Amber Peters should have the world at her feet. But her secret addiction has led her down a dangerous path - and given her deadly enemy.

Lap dancer Skye Ellwood is desperate to escape her tawdry life, but has no idea how - until a client makes her a proposition she can't refuse.

Following an ultimatum from his fiancee, gorgeous A-list movie star Joe Jeffreys is finally heading to reheb to sort out his sex addiction and save his squeaky-clean image.

Spoiled daughter of a legendary rock god, Petal Gold is convinced she's a huge star in waiting, and she'll trample on anyone she thinks is standing in her way.

Passion, jealously, betrayal, revenge and scandal :
during their tumultuous thirty days in LA at the Cascabel reheb clinic, the lives of Amber, Skye, Joe and Petal will be transformed forever. But for one of them, the stakes could not be higher - nor the situation more dangerous...

Sophia's Birthday~

Yesterday was a hottie's birthday. We went out at 7pm. First, we went to a bistro to have our dinner. There are five of us. Flora, Josephine, Pit Wan, m3, and last but not least, the hottie, Sophia. =)

The Queen of the day.

Next, we went to CF which known as Chocolate Factory. There are a band performed there. One of them looks chinese but actually they are from Philiphine. And they can sing chinese song. 神木与瞳 - 宽恕. Next round will be White Room. Yesterday was ladies night. We all got a free cocktail drinks. And, we ordered mineral water. (That was the first time i order mineral water in pub) I would like to find some snacks, but failed to. =/ Pit wan need to go back early, so Sophia fetched her go home (another cinderella) so I followed Flora's car. We went to Rain Pub. What a silence night. Only one table of customers, plus us equal to two. Flora ordered 2 bottles of beer, we only can finish one. Left one for the next time. I dont know can do reservation in pub. Overall, yestersay was a fun fun day. xD